Are You Listening?
It is easy to say yes, but really, many people don’t actually listen.
You go into fix-it mode right off the bat.
Your agenda activates, meaning you start thinking about what you think the other person should or shouldn’t do instead of what they want.
Your own concerns, fears, wounds, neediness, and arrogance flare up and in some cases, you are listening to those more than you are to the person talking to you.
It can be really uncomfortable to listen.
Maybe the person is sharing something difficult he/she is going through. You care about him/her and he/she is uncomfortable or are in some sort of pain. You know they are frustrated or hurting.
And that is uncomfortable for you, too.
You want the discomfort to stop—for both of you.
So you try to fix or placate, and as fast as possible.
Again, it is understandable.
Unfortunately, it is not necessarily helpful or supportive, although done with good intentions.
(Warning: grody analogy coming up. Sorry, but it is what came to mind so I went with it.)
It is kind of like when your stomach is upset and you feel like you are going to throw-up. It’s uncomfortable, both leading up to throwing-up and actually throwing-up. But at some point in the cycle you are wishing to throw-up because you know you will feel better after you do. Can you imagine if at that point someone tried to cover your mouth or told you to notthrow up, or somehow implied it is bad to throw up?
Instead, what if they said, “I know it is uncomfortable, but your body knows what to do. Let’r rip. I’ll hold your hair.”
To listen, really listen, you might have to be okay with being uncomfortable or be okay with someone else being uncomfortable.
It’s only temporary.
In my experience, having been on both the listening and the hear-me-out ends, it is immensely helpful—powerful—to be heard out. It helps clear out clutter and confusion and, (this is really important) it lets the person know he/she matters.
Once you have listened, sure, say something. “I believe in you.” “I know you will be able to find a good solution to this.” “Wow, that is challenging, but I know you can do it.” If you have some experience that is relevant, share it.
I bring this up because how you listen to others is quite possibly how you listen to yourself, or more importantly, how you listen to your Soul.
In a previous blog post “I Sat Down…” I shared that your Soul is always up for a chat, so the question becomes are you listening and how do you listen?
Or simply, do you listen?
Do you jump in with how you think it should be? (BTW, that “you” is your ego, your not-so-wise self.)
Would you be okay with hearing something different than what you might thought?
Also in, “I Sat Down….” I shared that one time when tuning-in to my intuition to put “finishing” touches on a program, it led me to create a completely different program than what I thought, and it required me to work on a new one for another40 days. Not what I initially wanted or expected, but I am thankful I listened because it was an amazing 40 days and it is a beautiful program that I get to share with others.
Listening to your Soul can require some uncomfortable moments.
Maybe as in the example I just shared, you are guided to do something different than you were thinking, or in a different way. Can you set aside your way and instead embrace “the” way.
Maybe it means you have to own up to how you behaved unfairly toward yourself or another person. (Good news with those moments: your Soul does not judge or criticize you so it actually doesn’t sting too badly. I would rather have that conversation with my Soul than a person.)
In essence, listening to your Soul can mean stepping into the unknown and that is uncomfortable.
Maybe it means “stepping into your power,” and let me just say, that at times is really uncomfortable. Sounds lovely and is great, but man!… it can be uncomfortable. (And then it is really freeing and fun so totally worth it!)
Can you listen to your Soul then say, “I believe in You.” Both “you’s.” Your Soul-You and your earth-you, which means believing in yourself.
Listening to your Soul could mean you have to accept that you are more powerful and have more talent, skills, abilities, resources, and courage than you are giving yourself credit for.
In other articles I share how your Soul communicates with you. Click here to read those.
Also, my “Practical Intuition” 4-video series to better understand how your intuition works will be available soon. Great information and complimentary, so enter your email below to have the videos delivered to you.
Live in your power,